Hello and What the HECK??

OK. Here goes. My first blog. I can't believe that I am nervous about this. I guess the thing that gets me is - "What am I going to write about?" and "Who the heck is going to be interested?" I've never been able to keep a diary - Well, I should say I've never been able to write in them for any duration. I've got two that I can think of that I've had for years, with maybe 10 entries in each. What's even sadder is that the dates of each entry can be a year apart, but written on the same page.
I have tossed this around for a while, but had talked myself out of it. After all, I do not have a heart wrenching job with Red Cross like my soul-sister Julie or am funny and endearing like her daughter, and mine by proxy, Jenny.

However, this morning that all changed. On my way to work, I was given a Mardi Gras Salute by my very bosomy mother-in-law. And suddenly it hit me - I need a place to just say - What the HECK?????

I have had several What the HECK? moments over the last year. We moved in with my husband's parents last August. They have been in poor health and really needed someone close by to help. Jesse had been building a smaller more manageable home for them next door to the original home his dad built in the eighty's. However, he was unable to finish it before we had to be out of our home in Marble Falls. So we spent the next 9 months in the guest room. Somehow, we both managed to revert to children in his mother's eyes. Everything we did was subject to comment and judgement. Nothing was out of bounds. Not our mail, children or sex life. Yes! I said sex life. Apparently, she couldn't figure out when we were doing the deed. (What the HECK?!) I have to admit I was worried about moving in with and then living next door to my in laws. I think any red blooded American woman would. However, I was optimistic. After all, we had gotten along well on our visits that occurred regularly, since we only lived an hour away. Further more, we are two adult, loving, flexible, considerate women. Right?! Plus, Jess and I were moving closer in order to provide an assistive living type situation for his parents. Surely, it would all work out. How hard could it be?

Excuse me now while I pick myself up off the floor after falling out of my chair and laughing for the last 5 minutes. I just realized the depth of my stupidity! I say stupidity because I cannot claim to be naive. I had the rare and joyful opportunity to live several years with my first mother-in-law. It was some of the best years of my life. I have counted myself blessed to have been able to share my life with her and the whole crazy family. It was tough at times for us both, but the good times far out weighed the bad. I was stupid to not see that these two women are very different. Both are caring, loving, giving individuals whose families are the world to them. However, each sees their roles as mothers very differently. I guess my first clue should have been during a conversation with my husband's brother, Mark the Christmas before The Move. After I had commented on how well their family was adjusting to having his mother-in-law move into their home, he told me," This is nothing, Tammie. You've got the tough job. You're gonna have to deal with my mother." Those words have haunted me often in the last year. I could go on and on and on....

Well, I guess I should explain the Mardi Gras reference earlier in my ramblings. Mrs. Ruby, the lady in question, has recently been diagnosed with a case of shingles. This is one of the most painful things a person can have. Knowing that Mrs. Ruby's pain tolerance is not very high on a good day, I decided to check in on her before I went to work. I asked her how she was feeling and she replied,"Not well. I just hurt all over." Then before I could blink, this 76 year old woman pulled her nightgown up over head to show me the patch under her arm. It was early in the morning, so no bra was in attendance. Who needs coffee after a sight like that? Thankfully, we were both on opposite sides of the counter so I didn't get a full frontal view. Thank God for small blessings!
I have one more What the Heck?? Jesse has been asking Mrs. Ruby and Papa all day what they would like to eat for dinner. They kept saying they weren't hungry and would take care of themselves. About 6pm, he decided to leave it alone. (They tend to eat dinner between 4 and 5:30.) We decided to just relax and graze on sandwiches or something ourselves. At 6:30 Mrs. Ruby calls. "Tammie, Jesse has been asking me all day what I wanted to eat and I have been telling him nothing. I have been nauseous and haven't been hungry. Well, I'm hungry now, so I was wondering what you all have over there that we can eat." Arrg!