3rd Fill or Not?

I had my appointment for my third fill this week; which means I was nervous all that day. Each time I go to the clinic, I feel like I am being being judged. I know that it is all in my mind. However, I stress out each time.

The same, ugly questions keep running through my head

Am I on track?

Did I lose enough?

Am I eating right?

What if I am wasting this opportunity?

What if I fail?

I am so proud of the weight I have lost. It makes me feel great. But, in the back of my mind, I know that I have a lot, a whole lot, of weight left to lose. The thought of not meeting my goal scares me to death. It almost paralyzes me sometimes.

So, when I go to officially weigh in, I feel almost like my future is on the line. And the Physicians Assistants hold it all in their skinny, little hands. They are so nice and helpful. But, they make me stand on a scale- With My Clothes On!!

Consequently, I think they are really sadists.

Luckily, I got a surprise this time. I was told that I just might be in the Green Zone. The Green Zone is when you are at the optimal level of bandage (for lack of a better term.) At the optimal level, you will only be hungry three times a day, eat about 1/2 a cup of food to be full, and be losing weight. Surprise! Since I have lost seven pounds in three weeks, the decision was for No fill this time. I am going to wait two weeks and see how things go. If things stay the way they are now, I'll cancel the appointment and reschedule for another two weeks. If I start getting hungry all the time or stop losing weight, I will keep the appointment and get another fill.

Yippee!

I don't know how long it will last, but I am going to enjoy this victory.

Do you feel it?

The joy?

It's that overwhelming feeling that makes you want to wiggle and lift your face to the sky. It makes your whole body smile, not just your face. Joy bursts from your pores and should make people near your smile.

Can you imagine it?

Yeah! That's it!