Need a PowWow

I have a problem. My problem has been known to cause me some embarrassment - and frankly, I don't need any help in that department. I embarrass myself quite easily without any help. Thank you very much!

I am hoping that someone out there can relate to my dilemma. You see, I my brain is my problem. How can your brain be a problem? Well...... It doesn't always agree or even live in the same plane as my body and my common sense.

I think that part of my problem is a side effect of getting older. My brain forgets - (How can it forget?!?!) that I am in my early, VERY EARLY, forties. The ol' brain seems to think I am still a young woman in my 20's. Or on other days, when it's hold on reality is very poor, a preteen. My brain, that sweet, optimistic thing, sings out loud and clear, "Wouldn't it be fun to jump on the back of this boring, old shopping cart and sail down this aisle?" Let me tell you, the brain is very powerful. On days like this, it pulls out all the stops. Suddenly, I can imagine jumping on the cart, and with a swift push from my right leg, the cart starts to fly. The rows of cans and boxes become a blur. I can 'feel' the wind on my face; blowing my hair back. My heart soars and I feel invincible.

Then to my horror - I actually put my left foot on the bottom of the basket. I start to push forward..... Just a little....... And the front of the basket pops up off the floor!!!

Now, is when common sense shows up - Finally!

My common sense paints a completely different picture in my imagination. It, too, is very powerful, even if it is late to show up. I imagine stepping onto the bottom of the basket. I push forward with all my might. Instead of flying down the aisle, the front of the cart flips up to a 90 degree angle, causing me to lose my balance. I bust my hiney on the floor and bounce a few times, while various can goods fly through the air all around me. A box of malt-o-meal barely misses my head on my third and final bounce. People begin milling around me and I have to think of some reason why I am on the ground surrounded by food.

I, having come back to reality, take my foot off the bottom of the basket and start perusing the vegetables for that perfect can of cream corn. Crisis averted!

My brain doesn't give up that easily, though. It is just waiting for another opportunity.

Sometimes, I let it take over. Like when I feel the irrepressible urge to skip or do a silly dance. Or pretend I can dance - when no one is home to see me 'strut my stuff.' Then there are the times the ol' brain suggests doing a cart wheel in the yard. Luckily, my body starts shouting very loudly, "Are you NUTS?!! You have NEVER been able to do a cart wheel. What makes you think you can do one now?! Not only will you embarrass yourself, but you will probably break a bone to boot! You're not a getting any younger, you know." (My body is a bit pessimistic. Sure, I would embarrass myself, but break a bone? Never! Well, probably not. OK. OK. I more than likely would break a bone. But, I don't need to be reminded I'm getting older. That's just rude!)
So, I sigh and go about my business; being boring and dull. Ho hum, poor me.

There are the times that common sense and my body, just lay low and don't even whisper a warning. Unfortunately for me, this usually occurs when I am working in the house or outside. They both just sit back and let my brain tell me I can lift, drag, pull, haul, and carry all sorts of over sized, heavy objects. Then, when all the work is done, the body says, "Shouldn't have done that!" Well, crud! Now you tell me!

I guess, what I want to know is this: Does your brain ever catch up with your body and common sense? Or does it stay forever optimistic and youthful? Will I feel the sudden urge to jump and touch a low, hanging sign when I am 75? Will I be tempted to see how high I can kick and still touch my outstretched hand when I am 80? Will I want to jump on a carousel so much, that I can 'feel' the wind kissing my cheek when I am 95? I sincerely hope so. Honestly, I do.